Ho’oponopono is a Hawaiian prayer that means mental cleansing. This is one of my favourite exercises that I do during most sessions. It is simple but profound. The ho’oponopono prayer can be applied to a room or space to clear the energy of the space. I sometimes do this when I am teaching or in the clinic to clear the energy of the space and replace it with love. When doing this, I imagine how the room or space feels, imagine what would make me feel that way, and then apply the process.
The Ho’oponopono Meaning
Ho’oponopono is a Hawaiian term meaning mental cleansing. The ho’oponopono mantra was initially developed to help people resolve conflicts by transforming them into love. This is done by one of the people owning their part of the conflict, recognising what issues they bring to the argument, and then resolving the issues by forgiving themselves and sending love. When people come together socially or professionally, the result reflects both people – their energy, personality, and unresolved issues.
When one person makes a change, it affects the other person. In some approaches to healing, all that is required to facilitate healing is for the practitioner to get into a good healing space. In these types of holistic approach of self help, it is recognised that the practitioner and the client’s energy is connected and that when the practitioner acts from an authentic, centred, empty space, the healing is much more effective.
My Experience with Ho’oponopono
This is one of my favourite exercises that I do during most sessions to become heart centred. It is simple but profound. The process is adapted from one that was developed by Morrnah Nalamaku Simeona, a Hawaiian Kahuna Lapa’au. One of the great things about this exercise is that it helps us learn from the people we come in contact with and act from the place of love.
There are four steps to the process that I use. They involve taking responsibility for issues that I share with the person I am focussing on or my client, asking forgiveness, clearing these issues with love, and being thankful. I think it works well because it creates the right frame of mind – you start with self-responsibility and then replace stress with love. Any process that makes us more heart centred will ultimately be to our benefit.
Learn the Ho’oponopono Prayer
The Ho’oponopono process can be used where we are in conflict with another person, reminding us that it is ourselves as well as the person that has something to learn from the experience and that by one’s healing, the other is also helped to heal.
The Ho’oponopono process is broken down into four steps. These steps are done within your own mind and do not require interaction with the other person. These healing sessions last about a couple of minutes and are as follows: I love you, I’m sorry, forgive me, thank you.
They involve taking responsibility for issues that I share with the person I am focussing on or my client, asking forgiveness, clearing these issues with love, and being thankful. I generally do not get overly enthusiastic about self-help processes. This is one, though, that I have found to work very well and clients have also reported that it works well for them.
I’m Sorry
The first step is to recognise that the people we come across and the situations that we confront provide opportunities for understanding ourselves better. It seems that people with certain issues seem to attract situations or other people that have something in common with that. For example, I used to feel numb to my emotions. After having kinesiology sessions on this issue, I feel much more connected to my heart. Having had that experience, I seem to attract a lot of clients with similar issues. So the first question to ask is:
‘What issue do I have that would make me feel/act that way (the way the other person is)?’
I recognise that all humans share common issues. I work from the premise that the other person only enters my life if I share something with them. I ask myself what issues do I have that would make me feel like they do? I am not trying to work out from their perspective why they feel the way they do. This is my own internal process where I think about what issues I have that would make me feel like they do.
Why It’s Important
Taking responsibility is one of the most important steps a person has to take to engender ‘self empowerment’. Instead of blaming others or external circumstances, a person needs to find what it is about themselves that has contributed to their condition and by doing so take control of their condition. Step 1 turns that notion on its head and has you apply the same approach to yourself. Instead of seeing the other person as unrelated to yourself you instead look inward to see what unresolved issues you hold in common with the other person.
The reason why we take this step is that, by recognising and then processing unresolved issues that we share with a client, we put ourselves in the best possible space to help the client. The theory is that also by clearing our stress, we help the client clear their own.
Forgive Me
I say: ‘I’m sorry, please forgive me’.
In this step, I ask forgiveness from God or spirit, not because I need to be forgiven, but because I need to forgive myself. God or spirit here represents my innate essence or deepest self. Asking for forgiveness is a way of opening up to forgiving myself.
So, this Ho’oponopono step is about remaining whole, connected, and at one with ourselves. We do that by asking for forgiveness from God or spirit. If you believe in neither, perhaps ask forgiveness of your inner self.
Why It’s Important
For a long time, I did not understand the connection between God/spirit and myself. I was upset with God when someone I was close to died. I asked, as many people have done, why God did not look after those I loved.
What I did not understand at the time was that by being upset with God I also disconnected from my own essence. In our heart or essence, when we are in the Gestalt brain, we only understand connection. That is connection to all things, the world, the universe, spirit, or God. When we are upset with spirit, we create an internal disharmony as well. For many years, I did not understand this. It was only when I began forgiving God/spirit that I began to forgive myself and connect better inside.
Thank You
This step is a simple thank you to God/spirit and the other person for helping me with this issue.
I Love You
This is the last step of the ho’oponopono prayer. In this step, I visualise sending love to God/spirit, to myself, and to my client. It is amazing when you do this often, how it changes the way you feel. Even just visualising sending love changes your state of mind.
It is a wonderful feeling to send love; it is grounding and it clears the mind. It also changes the energy between me and the other person.
Benefits of Ho’oponopono Meditation
I generally do not get overly enthusiastic about self-help processes. This ho’oponopono mantra I have found works very well and clients have also reported that it works well for them. I think it works well because it creates the right frame of mind – you start with self-responsibility and then replace stress with love that will help with clearing your mind. Any process that makes us more heart-centred will ultimately be to our benefit.
Dr. Hew Len’s Story of Ho’oponopono
Between 1983 and 1987, Dr. Hew Len cured a ward of insane patients without meeting them, simply by reading their files. When asked how he did this, Dr. Len would always say, “I was simply healing the part of me that created them.” He simply went through their files and healed himself.
The Ho’oponopono healing process that Dr. Len used involved thinking about the mindset of those patients and asking for forgiveness by connecting with them at a subconscious level. By doing that, Dr. Len created a space where Divinity could bring those patients inspiration and transmutation.
How to Apply the Ho’oponono Technique to Your Everyday Life
The ho’oponopono four-step process can be used in many ways. Sometimes, I teach clients how to use this process at home to help them feel better about themselves, another person, or a particular situation.
Where they want to feel better about another person, perhaps someone they are in conflict with, they apply the process as outlined above, thinking of what would make them behave as the other person does. Or, alternatively, they can think of why the other person affects how they feel.
For example, I may think to myself that the room feels neglected because it is never appreciated by those working in it. I then need to recognise what issues I have that would lead me to feel neglected, ask forgiveness, and then send love. It is amazing how different this self healing process will make you feel and the space of the room.
Frequently Asked Questions
The word “Ho’oponopono” (sometimes spelled hooponopono, oponopono, or ho pono pono) is pronounced (HO-oh-Po-no-Po-no). In Hawaiian, “Pono” means “balance” and “Ho’oponopono” means, roughly, “to bring things into balance”.
The Ho’oponopono prayer helps you purify your body and get rid of unpleasant memories or emotions that hold you back in your daily life. The Ho’oponopono prayer reminds you of your connections to everything in your life and of your connection to Divinity.An art process would be offered and then the therapist would amplify the symbols and how it relates to the client’s present life.
The Ho’oponopono technique is an ancient Hawaiian spiritual practice that teaches us to accept “Total Responsibility” for everything that surrounds us. Ho’oponopono shows us that through confession, forgiveness, gratitude, and love, we can heal our world by healing ourselves and that when we forgive others, we forgive ourselves.
